Moisturization
Hello? Hello. Hi. ' Who am I speaking with? '''Uhh, I'm calling for Joan. ' Oh, Jones? 'Yeah. ' Ok, how can I help you? 'Yeah, they wanted to get that moisturization going. ' I'm sorry, the which one? 'The one they've heard so much about. ' You're calling in behalf of Jones to...can you repeat yourself again? 'Yeah, yeah, yeah, you bet. To get that moisturization, uh, runnin'. ' Moisturization? 'Yeah. ' What's moisturization? 'Uh, the same one, they have been hearing so much about. That was promoted by Mookie Blaylock, among others. ' ...Mookie Blaylock. '''Yeah. Hmm...you lost me there. So you wanna shine us up? Or...where do you stand, you know? The moisurization? You bet. Well, you know, the beautification, really. ''' Oh, the beautification? '''Just some good old boys, you know? Oh ok. Just a few of us and... You guys are a band? Well, yeah, we were in Newsweek. You might have seen that thing that was a mermaid in there, and... What kind of music do you guys play? Uh, like, caveman. ' Like cavemen? '''Yeah. ' Oh. Cause all I have here... the bands that do play for me, they play salsa and cumbia and merengue. A lot of Spanish or Latin music, '''Well, you willin' to moisten us up or what? Umm, we don't play that kind of music here. Which kind? Umm, you said "caveman"? Well, I mean... ''' Like I said, we're a salsa and merengue place, a Latin...we have a lot of Latin music here, so. '''Oh, you do? Yeah, that's all we play here. I've already tried all the other different... I've tried blues nights. I've tried jazz and nothing else works other than the Latin music so that's what I to. Would you try, uh, moistenin' me up? Or... I would not be inclined to try it. Well, I mean, they gave me your number, you know. ''' Who gave you my number? '''Um, Kokey Blaylock. Kokey Blaylock? Kokey Blaylock...I don't know who Kokey Blaylock is. Ohhhh. At least you gotta pay me back then. I gotta pay you back? Yes. Pay you back for what? Like with PayPal or somethin'. ' With PayPal? '''Yeah...you can just go online and just, uh, send me a payment. ' A payment of what? 'Well, it'd be like a hundred and seventy-five. ' A hundred seventy-five dollars, for...? 'Plus, plus their seven percent fee. So it'd actually be like uh, one eighty-two total. ' What would I be paying you for? 'Well, I mean, the referal. If you're not gonna get, get me moisturization, then, like, I just need reimbursement, you know, just expenses. ' Expenses? I didn't hire you, I didn't call you, I didn't...you know. 'Oh yes, you did. For the whole beautification project. ' What beautification project are you talking about? 'Mookey Blaylock. ' I don't know who Mookey Blaylock is, I don't know what they hell you're talking about. '''Well all of a sudden you expect me to be a merengue dancer or somethin' and all I'm sayin'... What are you talking about? You called me, all right? You called me and you're telling me that... No, I didn't. ...beautification. I don't know what the hell you're talking about. I don't know what you're talking about. I'm a bar owner, I'm a bar owner and I have... that's the kinds of bands... How do you expect me to dance? Seriously! What dancing? What dancing? What the hell are you talking about? I'm talking about a few good old boys. Coming down. Gettin' moisturized. And then you're talking about merengue dancing and I've already outlaid a hundred seventy-five dollars through Kokey Blaylock. That's not my fault. That's not my fault. You need to talk to Quarky, or whoever the hell gave you my number, cause that's not my fault. I had nothing to do with that. It was on a wall. "It was on a wall." Dude, lose my number, all right? Yes it is. ' Lose my number. --- Hello, this is George. '''George, yeah, listen. Can I just get an online payment from you? ' You're not getting no payments from me. I don't know who you are, you just gonna pick up the phone and call me and tell me "send me a payment"? You're crazy! 'We'll call it good. One seventy-five, you can just skip... ' You're full of it buddy. Lose my number! '''You can just skip the fees, you know? What fees are you talking about! The PayPal! I don't know who you are, I've never hired you, I have nothing to do with you... You've never heard of Mookie Blaylock before. Is that what... I don't know who the hell Mookie Blaylock is! You secured it with Kokey Blaylock for me to come out here. ''' I didn't secure with anybody, anything. '''And now you're not going to moisturize us? Moisturize...what the hell are you talking about? What are you talking about "moisturizing"? What moisturizing? What the hell are you talking about? I'm lookin' at a digital signature from you. ''' Uh huh. From me. '''And you can skip the song and dance about the merengue stuff. All I need is a PayPal. You "need a PayPal." Cause I hired you, cause I didn't hire anybody. I didn't hire you, I don't know who Mookey is, I don't know what you're talking about. You're calling the wrong person. Let me give you my email address. ''' I don't want your email address. '''And you can send me a PayPal payment. I'm not going to send you no PayPal payment! We'll call it good. Talk to my lawyer. I don't know who the hell you are. You're just gonna pick up the phone and call me and say, "Oh yeah, send me a hundred and seventy-five dollars." You're full of shit! Absolutely not. ' What are you talking about? I don't know who you are. I never hired you. I don't know who this Mookie-person you're talking about is. I don't know what the hell you're talking about. '''You can skip the seven percent. ' You're calling me telling me I don't know what the hell moisurizing is? The fuck you talking about, dude? '''Beautification of the whole project, man. Of what project!? I don't know what freakin' project you're talking about. I'm thinking just some good old boys coming down. Thinking of some good old boys coming down and I'm gonna pay a hundred seventy-five bucks for some good old boys coming down to do what? We can't do merengue movements and things like that. It's not gonna happen. I don't know what you're talking about, I don't know what you're talking about. Lose my number or you're going to piss me off. You're going to fuckin' piss me off. Lose my fucking number. You call me one more time, I swear, dude... Let me run across you, you son of a bitch. Lose my number. Why don't you just send me a PayPal payment and we'll call it good? We're not calling anything here nothing. You want a seventy-five, why don't you come over here and come collect... It's one seventy-five. ' Come over here and try to collect the money. Come over here. And try to collect that money. '''Well if it's certified, I will. ' Certified what? There's not certification -I don't know who you are. 'I'm not takin' personal checks. ' I'm not giving you no money. Ok? I'm not giving you no money. '''I already incurred a hundred seventy-five dollars in expenses. Well that's not my fault! I don't know who they hell you are! If you don't have moisture and you've got all kinds of other thins happening, that's not my fault. What the hell's moisture? What the hell are you talking about? What are you talking about? I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. Kokey Blaylock, that doesn't ring a bell? I don't know who the fuck Kokey Blaylock is! Well that's why I'm trying to give you my email address. You can just send me the payment, we'll call it good! I'm not sending you a fucking ''payment, you understand me? '''No. I don't, really. ' I ain't sending you a fucking penny. I don't know who the fuck you are. I don't know who the fuck Kokey Blaylock is. Lose my number. You wanna meet? I'll meet you right now. I'm over here at my bar. Come over. I'll be there in, fifteen minutes. ' Bring it. '''You'll call me a cab. ' ..fucking call you a cab. You're stupid! What the fuck's a matter with you. Who the fuck are you? '''I'm not walkin' down there! Who the fuck are you? Who are you calling me? From Joan! ' From Joan? '''Like I said. ' I don't who you are. I don't what the fuck - what side of the bed you got up today, buddy, but you're talking to the wrong number, buddy. You're dialing the wrong number. '''Are you trying to tango with me!? I'm not trying to tango! You're the one that called me! You're the one that called me. And now you're trying to "call me a cab." What the fuck's the matter with you? You're a fucking idiot! Why don't moisten me up a little bit? ''' Moisten you up? Dude, you're going to fuckin' piss me off, dude. You're gonna fuckin' piss me off really bad right now. Lose my fuckin' number. You call me one more time, you son of a bitch, watch what's gonna happen to you. '''What? Lose my fuckin' number, all right? Why don't you just cut me a check? --- Hello? Hey, listen, let me just give you my email address. ''' Dude, listen to me. If this is a fuckin' joke, whatever you guys are doing, you need to cut it off already. '''You better quit jokin' around with me, pal! I'm not jokin around with you. You're the one calling me! I did not! You called me! No I didn't! I'm on my phone and you're on the other line. I need PayPal in the next forty-five minutes. You kiss my ass. Put PayPal up your ass too. 'You don't even have my email address. ' Dude, you're going to piss me off. 'I need a payment and I need it within the hour. ' I'm not giving you no payment. I ain't giving you no money. I don't know who Mookie Blaylock is; you're crazy. You're full of shit; you're crazy. 'I'll take care of you real quick if I come down there. ' Well come on down! Come on down! 'What? You don't think I'll come down there? ' Come on down! Come on down, you dumb shit. Come on down. 'I'll be the only leavin'. ' Ok. Come on down. 'I wanna see a check book when I get there. ' You can fuckin' kiss my ass. Come on down. You think you're fucking tough. Come on down. Dumb shit. Category:George Category:Bars and clubs Category:Music